I have over the years contributed to this blog. My grandma liked my blog. I can say that with some assurance as unknown to me she printed it in its entirety and kept it in a box among her possessions, which I found while going through her things. So I felt that it was fitting to put an entry in just for her.
Not everyone is blessed with having a “place,”. We had a place. It was magical, complete with a wide rolling river, a dock for jumping into it, boats and fishing poles. It came with hot days, peanut butter sandwiches, and home made pickles. We learned a lot there. Not the least of which was how to drive a boat and a lawn mover(years or sometimes a solid decade before we’d drive cars), how to shoot a gun(sometimes at each other,) how to fix anything, how to heal a bird that got hurt sneaking into the berry fence(and then later discover said bird had tried getting into berries again and ended up in grandpas dead bird pile, how to find and then keep caterpillars that would change into monarch butterflies, how to get a dental retainer that had fallen off the dock back by dredging the river-twice, how to grow a garden, how to cook, how to make your bed(within minutes of waking up,) how to say your prayers, how to find joy in a black and white television, and so many more. But the thing that made the place both physically real and magical was our grandparents. They were people like us, flawed and human but to us they were perfect. My grandma carried the torch of the place after my grandfathers death 22 years ago.
Putting my grandma “to rest” as they say this week was bitter sweet. She left a legacy of 2 wonderful children, six amazing grandkids, and six and counting sprouting great grandchildren. She has impacted all of our lives, not in a small way. I may be speaking out of turn for some but I feel I can say with some confidence we are all much better people for having known her.
She was stubborn but steady, and even when letting us know in her not at all subtle way that she may have a better idea of how we could do things(occasionally being right), we always knew we had her love, and a place. I’m not sure how to thank someone for that. Over the years I tried, tried to tell her, tried to show her, but there is no way to pay that back.
We have each other. She helped to weave the bonds that we share. We like her are good at making sure each other know when we have a better idea of how to do things, but we love each other, and we are untimately each other’s new “place.”
We went to say goodbye to her in the tiny church she used to drag us to as children in the clothes she made for us(some more itchy than others) with the people who became our neighbors and friends too, which was beautiful and she would have been so pleased we were all in church. But for me the moment of the day that showed me that the magic(she would
not like that I’m using that word)was still alive was walking(maybe slightly trespassing-she wouldn’t have liked that either) on the physical “place” for one more goodbye. The trees we had memorized the bark on as children are still there just bigger, the irrigation faucets we used to catch frogs in are still there next to the lava rock grass border/balance beam my grandfather laid 50 years ago, and as we walked down to the river the largest flock of geese I’d ever in nearly 40 years seen were there waiting for us.
As they scattered into their orderly flight with our approach I couldn’t help but remember how much my grandma loved those geese. Geese mate for life. There was always a pair who lived across the river bank. My grandparents had named them Henry and Henrietta. Unless geese live 50 years there were several pairs. But she would always point them out. My grandma and grandpa truly mated for life. A large part of hers ended 22 years ago when he died. So the symbolism of the geese to me was really overwhelming. I believe like the geese who returned each year together my grandparents are now together. I will miss her dearly but will carry her with me and all the lessons she left me along with the afghan of woven together people I call family. I’m grateful that I had the chance to have such an amazing woman as my Grandma.
